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WELCOME TO THE AMAZING NAUGHTY SHOP OF ONIRICITY! – ASSISTANCE HOTLINE 666550

MAGIC ONION

Try the new psychedelic onions, and live the dream!

This fantastic vegetables grown in the desert at the east city borders, in the ex nuclear testing area, damn they are so good!

VODKA

Ehy soviet man do you ever miss mother Russia?

Try this fresh 88’s imported vodka!

WHISKY

You are a warrior!

True warriors drink the original scottish whisky at least three times a day!

5 DOLLARS BILL

Incredible deal only this month!

A crisp five dollars bill for just for ten dollars! Feel the iconic fragrance of the original five dollars bill!

DIRTY THONG

Some people they like to sniff used panties and who’s to blame them?

Smell the original pornstar Candy Suxxx thong, direct from her last set in Europe!

USED HEELS

Satisfy your fetish thirst like us, buy this pump heels of the best stripper in the city!

You have a kinky soul!

BANANAS SHRIMPS PIE

What’s good to eat today?

The sweetness of shrimps joined the creaminess of bananas for an incredible pleasure pie!

Try it in your sexual game with your partner!

LEMARCHAND CUBE

Tired than usual Rubik cube?

It’s time to play with new LeMarchand puzzle!

Train your brain, protect your meat!

ALIEN AUTOPSY VIDEO

Fox Mulder was right!

Check out this 90’s VHS with an original uncured video of grey alien autopsy!

Lot of blood and a creepy final scene will be scare your night for a long time!

UNICORN SPERM

This colorful shiny cream is perfect for moisturize your skin for smooth massage!

Or eat it to cure your erection problems!

Pump up your night and protect your skin at the same time!

SPECIAL PASS FOR AREA51

Are you curious?

The government aren’t telling you the whole story?

Pick up this card and fly in Nevada my friend…but…take care yourself!

DEEP WEB RETRO LAPTOP

This is a old computer with a special setup for your weird travel in the dark side of the web.

Is also equipped with specific nigerian counterspy software and coin boxers for bitcoin.

KEY FOR HOLLOW EARTH DOOR

Mighty dinos?

Little people?

Another universe?

You can visit the Hollow Earth with this special key like you are on a cruise for Mykonos!

BAPHOMET FUR

Pump up your friday night with ancient rituals!

This ugly fur is ripped directly from the dark lord thighs, it’s a very rare product just for 666 dollars! Gorgeous!

ANIMATRONICS KAMASUTRA BOOK

The last three copies of this bestseller book!

Take off your fear for robot and loneliness and learn the animatronics sex secrets for your private perversions!

FINGERS IN BRINE

No one can live without a cup full of fingers in brine for every sunday brunch!

Just 25 dollars for 30 delicious human fingers, now with caribbean salt!